Treedom of Expression!

Entries from September 2007

Mysterious

September 26, 2007 · Leave a Comment

 

Someone searched for ‘Mallu Nurse’ and then showed up on this blog. Poor thing. There they were thinking ‘gauranteed satisfaction’ and instead they arrive at this PG rated site. Though they must have come here after visiting several of the not so PG rated ones. I repeated Mallu Nurse on google and couldn’t find me among the 476,000 results without special effort.

If you are coming back, sir / madam, you have all my sympathies and apologies for not catering to your requirements. May I recommend though that you pick up a copy of the Mid-day and go direct to the ‘Entertainment’ section of the classifieds. Passionate satisfaction is gauranteed. And if you are a madam, it is gratis. (Ladies membership free you see.)

Categories: Uncategorized
Tagged:

300i

September 23, 2007 · 1 Comment

A picked this one and insists my posting on the pleasures of ownership will speed up the healing process.

Categories: life

Oink Oink

September 23, 2007 · Leave a Comment

I’m sure there is some scope for irony in this. The first movie I see after moving from Punju land to Mumbai is called Loins of Punjab. But I’m too depressed to come up with a smart one on that. After a sad few days of looking at houses, the VoF bunch decided on impulse to turn up for a movie at the local mall. Loins was starting at 8:30 – good time for us to watch movie and still head back to catch match in case India was doing reasonably. And it did turn out to be a bloody good time. There were all of 32 people in the hall (including a Leela Mami of N’s acquaintance)and all of us spent the next hour and half in splits and atleast us four got back in time to watch Yuvi and Dhoni decimate the Ozzy bowling. Purrfect Saturday.

Fully recommendation. Go watch the Loins.

Categories: movies

In Mourning

September 22, 2007 · Leave a Comment

Its gone. Sigh.

Categories: cribs · life

3 Indians

September 19, 2007 · Leave a Comment

 

In the recent past some IWE has figured in my reading list. Shelfari does not recognise two of these books. In one case it is the double ignominy of being published by Rupa and not winning any awards and in the second case it is only the latter. (Aside: Always felt like I was buying underwear when I bought any Rupa publications.)

I stole Ravi Subramanian’s ‘If God was a Banker’ from Toinks. Having read (and enjoyed) Vidya Srinivasan’s No Onions, No Garlic, I figured the jaat might have some literary talent. Well, I was wrong. The Mumbai based author, an IIM graduate with several years experience in retail banking per the blurb, is not very googleable for a good reason. I would not admit to writing this book either. The book did start quite engagingly – the two protagonists and their just out of MBA aspirations do ring true. Then the authors own MBA origins begin to show. He has copy pasted all the banking scandals of the past two decades into the book and he has added some sex into the mix in order to make sure it sells. So read it if you didn’t read the papers in the past 10 years or if you are really hard up for the written word. Else skip it I say.

Chinnamani’s World, acquired more legitimately at the Delhi Book Fair, is a better read. I’m not sure if everyone will enjoy it as much. The author teaches at Ambedkar College which is a stone’s throw from my home in Bangalore. The story is set in ‘Indira’ Slum – a mildly fictionalised version of the slum near home. The very one which was the forbidden land that lay across the parthenium fields from our layout.  Lots of Tamil transliterations, which make the book enjoyable . The story (told in the third person) is of Chinnamani and his family, friends and life in the slum. Although the subject matter could be grim and there is much scope for sanctimonious pomposity the author does not succumb. So all in all – recommendation to read.

I don’t know if Kiran Desai really qualifies as Indian in the same way as Ravi Subramanian and Mukunda Rao. Her pedigree shows in the book. Impeccable writing, beautiful imagery and much style in the book but she does not tell a simple story. She unfailingly brings out the mean, defeated and frustrated aspects of the lives of each of her main characters. Perhaps she was trying to be ‘accurate’ , perhaps humanity does have such small motivation, but if that is the reality, I for one want to escape it. Lets put it this way - despite the quality of her craft, I enjoyed Mr. Subramanian’s oeuvre more!

Categories: books

In Praise of the Vernacular – 1

September 14, 2007 · 1 Comment

RainRain

Now that Bengaluru has turned into a Cherrapunji -it has rained all night and shows no signs of letting up this morning – there are two words of our ‘kasturi kannada’ that come to mind. ‘Kole’ and ‘Koche’. Typically used together in a tone of complete disgust and followed up or prefixed with ‘Tchah’ or any such exclamation, the line would go “Aiyyo. Yen Kole. Yen Koche. Tchah!”

 Why these two words? Well, because I can’t think of any other words in any other language that so precisely describe the slush that mars the roads and footpaths of the city after a spot of rain. The onomatopoeic Kole and Koche cover the ‘Kach’ sound that happens when you put your foot in the mix of rain, clay, waste (of human, animal and plant origins), urine, somebody’s spit out paan and various other things and manage to convey the crawling icky feeling that starts where the wet mush hits your toes and continues up and up till every hair on your skin is standing up and every inch of your skin is crawling with ick.

Note: The e in both words is pronounced so its Kole as in Kolay and not coal.

Categories: life

Oh F!

September 12, 2007 · Leave a Comment

Although I have abandoned LJ I still go back to catch the poetry. Today, for instance I found this one and discovered Kim Addonizio.

Fuck -  Kim Addonizio
There are people who will tell you
that using the word fuck in a poem
indicates a serious lapse
of taste, or imagination,
or both. It’s vulgar,
indecorous, an obscenity
that crashes down like an anvil
falling through a skylight

to land on a restaurant table,
on the white linen, the cut-glass vase of lilacs.
But if you were sitting
over coffee when the metal

hit your saucer like a missile,
wouldn’t that be the first thing
you’d say? Wouldn’t you leap back
shouting, or at least thinking it,

over and over, bell-note riotously clanging
in the church of your brain
while the solicitous waiter
led you away, wouldn’t you prop

your shaking elbows on the bar
and order your first drink in months,
telling yourself you were lucky
to be alive? And if you wouldn’t

say anything but Mercy or Oh my
or Land sakes, well then
I don’t want to know you anyway
and I don’t give a fuck what you think

of my poem. The world is divided
into those whose opinions matter
and those who will never have
a clue, and if you knew

which one you were I could talk
to you, and tell you that sometimes
there’s only one word that means
what you need it to mean, the way

there’s only one person
when you first fall in love,
or one infant’s cry that calls forth
the burning milk, one name

that you pray to when prayer
is what’s left to you. I’m saying
in the beginning was the word
and it was good, it meant one human

entering another and it’s still
what I love, the word made
flesh. Fuck me, I say to the one
whose lovely body I want close,

and as we fuck I know it’s holy,
a psalm, a hymn, a hammer
ringing down on an anvil
forging a whole new world.

Categories: poetry

Rats!

September 5, 2007 · Leave a Comment

I liked the half of Ratatouille I watched last week. So when I had to bribe an 8 year old, I thought, ‘Pixar Animation, pop corn and sugary drinks.Super winner combo’.  I should have known better.

The first hint came when we were driving to the movie hall. S was finally over his excitement at the surprise and now with the tickets in his hand he began to think. “Maasi, what movie is this?” he asked. So I said ‘Ratatouille. Its about a rat who wants to be a cook’. He tried to match that back with what was written on the ticket. ‘Ratatweele?’ “No. Ratatui,’ I said. He thought for a minute. ‘Aapko Chak De India ke tickets nahin mile kya?’. Uh oh. Too late in recalling that this kid had loved Partner. Sigh. And here I am thinking Sallu should go to jail as much for making stupid movies as for killing sundry wildlife.

We reached the movie hall and once we’d stocked up on the junk food, we found our seats. The short movie began. Completely brilliant. Normally the brilliance does elicit some laughter from moi but S was amazing – bouncing on the edge of his seat, his high, loud, gurgle of a laugh echoing in the movie hall. Each time the alien trainee made a mistake in the abduction volume grew and the length of laugh was directly proportional to the number of times the poor abductee got banged around the house. Once I had got my breath back from laughing so hard. I began to have hope. I may not have made such a big mistake.

Then Ratatouille began. All the slapstick bits got much response from S but the french accented dialogue and its smartness are meant more for adult appreciation. Post interval S was reduced to asking me at 10 minute intervals ‘Ab aur kitna baaki hai?’ Its not that he hated it, he just didn’t love it. As for me, I loved Anton Ego – its his character that really puts the bite in the movie but Pixar has made better movies in the past and hopefully will make better ones in the future.

Categories: movies